AshBlogs

Inspiration

Ash — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 02:45:47 +0000

The tag that inspired the email in the previous entry.

I’m a shoe in

Ash — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 00:17:28 +0000

A glimpse into an email I just wrote to my friend, Jilly.

OH! Soulmate!

I fricken LOATHE going shopping and will buy online if that is an option. Unless it’s for computer related stuff, then I’m the first one out the door. Oh yeah, and if it’s office supplies, pfft, I’ve already left your ass behind cuz I’m zooming my way to get new pens .. and paper … oh and crayons … and markers! and and and …

The Women’s club is gonna revoke my membership, I just know it, but the Geek’s club is thinking about making me president forever.

Feeling my age

Ash — Sun, 03 Feb 2008 20:26:03 +0000

The other night I was bitching to JD about having to take so many meds each night. I said “There’s one to keep my heart from exploding, one to keep my brain from exploding, one to help keep my eardrums from exploding, one to keep me from killing every one … oh, and a baby aspirin cuz apparently I’m a baby.”

I take a med to keep my heart from doing funky things, the brain one is my high blood pressure meds, the ear one is an antibiotic to make sure the fluid behind my eardrums doesn’t get infected before we can get it dried up and gone away and the one to keep me from killing them is my anti-stress/anti-depressant meds. LOL

He said “Damn, when you put it that way, you’re a walking timebomb! Umm, you aren’t running short on any, are ya? Especially that anti-stress one?”

Tanner chimed in with “God I hope not!”

Zach just shook his head and said “I’ll be in my room if anyone needs me … or gets attacked.”

My family … they love me.

Vague Possibilities

Ash — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 20:15:45 +0000

I was going through folders, cleaning stuff out and ran across this. I made it back in 2005 when I was experimenting with the Gorean lifestyle.

The exchange between Master and slave is pretty much a common exchange during collarings. The lyrics are from Seraphim Shock’s Some Sick Dream.

Yeah, odd that I’d have “him” whispering those words to her, because they are so not typically Gorean. But hey, what can I say? I tend to veer towards the romanticism in BDSM. If it’s not present, he’s lost me. My mind will be a million miles away.

So yeah, I didn’t last long in Gor. Hell, it’s a wonder I made it out without becoming sleen chow.

Punxsutawney Phil’s prediction: more winter – CNN.com

Ash — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 19:04:30 +0000

Punxsutawney Phil’s prediction: more winter – CNN.com
PUNXSUTAWNEY, Pennsylvania (AP) — Brace yourself for more wintry weather.
art.groundhog.gi.jpg

Punxsutawney Phil is the focus of attention at the annual event in a town northeast of Pittsburgh.

Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow Saturday, leading the groundhog to forecast six more weeks of winter.

The rodent was pulled from his stump by members of the Punxsutawney Groundhog Club Inner Circle, top-hat- and tuxedo-wearing businessmen who carry out the tradition.

Each February 2, thousands of people descend on Punxsutawney, a town of about 6,100 people some 65 miles northeast of Pittsburgh, to celebrate what had essentially been a German superstition.

The tradition is that if a hibernating animal sees a shadow on February 2 — the Christian holiday of Candlemas — winter will last another six weeks. If no shadow is seen, legend says spring will come early.

I say stop yanking the critter of out his hole at 8:00 friggen a.m.. Much smarter to wait until midnight and that’ll fix that little problem. This is not rocket science people.

Are you smarter than Ash?

Ash — Mon, 28 Jan 2008 05:46:14 +0000

I stumbled on just one of these. They are actually stupid-easy questions. Let’s see how you do. Answers are in Comments.

How many outs are there for an inning of baseball?
If there are 5 apples and you take away 2 apples, how many apples do you have?
Lee’s parents emigrated from china. they have five children. the first four are named la, le, li, and lo. what did they name the fifth?
A red house is made from red bricks. a blue house is made from blue bricks. a pink house is made from pink bricks. a black house is made from black bricks. what is a greenhouse made from?
The Spanish civil war, which began July 17 1936 was fought between….?
Do they have a fourth of July in England?

Outside the lines

Ash — Mon, 28 Jan 2008 04:06:59 +0000

What can I say? I’m uber-wild, I tell ya.

Ouch

Ash — Sun, 27 Jan 2008 21:07:54 +0000

When I got up this morning — ok, this afternoon — Z was sitting in the living room. Just sitting there, no tv on, not plugged into his cell phone. I said g’morning to him and chitchatted with him. He was unusually quiet and kinda down, but when I asked what was up, he said “nothing.” A bit later J told me that Z had been waiting for her for two hours, so that probably answers that question. His girlfriend is sweet but not the most reliable. Hell, she’s a 16 year old girl, most of them are bubbleheads anyway.

I asked Z what they had planned and he said he didn’t know yet.

Just a few minutes ago, I glanced out the office window to see Z’s girlfriend pull up, with a carload of friends, to pick up Z. Z had gone out into the garage to wait. When the car pulled up, Z climbed into the backseat and off they went, without Z poking his head in like he always does to give me his sweet goofy grin and to tell me he was going.

Everytime either one of the boys leaves the house there’s always the same exchange:

Me: Be careful
Kid: I will
Me: Love you
Kid: Love you too, Mom.

Always. Even when they are headed off to school, or even just up to the basketball court right up the street.

Didn’t happen today.

Ouch.

For some reason, and I’m sure there are lots of reasons that any 2-bit psych student could come up with, this made me really sad. Really sad. It probably doesn’t help that Z was uncharacteristically quiet.

So I did what any technologically savvy Mom would do.

Yep, I texted him. *grin* I sent him “Be careful. I love you.”

I got back “I will. I love you too.”

Yeah, I feel a little better.

He’s growing up, isn’t he? Crap.

Just last night I said in an email to a friend “He’s 16 1/2. He’s had the same girlfriend for over a year. They vanish into his bedroom for hours at a time. When looking for the phone the other day in his room I discovered a bottle of KY. Yet I’m convinced my sweet baby boy has no clue that he can use his pecker for anything other than peeing.”

I’m telling ya’ll – I’m up to my shoulders in this river of denial, but dammit he’s not making it easy to stay there. *sigh*

Isn’t this what they meant?

Ash — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 14:54:47 +0000

Hmm, maybe it’s not quite what they had in mind.

Oh! Think I could talk my boss into giving me a job in Marketing?

I’m betting this image makes some of ya’ll laugh and makes some of ya’ll nervously laugh and do more than a little squirming.

Amirite?

I can’t make this shit up

Ash — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 04:40:29 +0000

Actual messenger conversation between Zach and I tonight. (Yeah, we’re geeks, therefore we IM each other from two rooms away.) The only thing changed is our screen names because all I need is for someone to find my kid and fill his head with more stupid ideas. LOL

Also, not that it matters, but Z is dyslexic, so that will explain the misspelled words, shortcuts and missed words in sentences.

Conversation ended: Tue, Jan 08 21:04:27 2008

Conversation started between Ashen and Z: Mon, Jan 21 20:50:32 2008

Z: hey mom can i get a piercing

* Ashen falls out of her chair, laughing

Z: lol is that a yes or a no ?

Ashen: that’s a “you gotta be shitting me”

Z: so you would be mad at me if i pierce my lip

Ashen: you’d be grounded for life

Z: a week?

Ashen: Life

Z: why not

Ashen: Because that’s dangerous, not to mention gross. Zach, if I won’t let you get a tattoo that shows, do you really think I’m going to let you put metal through your lip??

Z: so you wouldn’t take me to get it done

Ashen: No and I won’t sign for it either.

Z: why whats wrong with it

Ashen: Hello? Did you miss the part about being dangerous and gross?

Z: you think a lip ring is gross

Ashen: yes

Z: lol why

Ashen: you already spill enough as it is. a hole in your lip sure as hell isn’t going to help any.

Z: i really want one

Z: why are they gross

Ashen: Because you’ll be drooling or sucking

Ashen: if you want to suck on something, I’ll buy you another pacifier.

Z: no no no i will not be sucking i will be f**king awesome lmao I’d have rims!

Ashen: LOL

Ashen: great, just what you need – spinners on your lip

Z: but why mom i like them i think it looks cool

Ashen: trust me, it doesn’t look cool.

Z: and i can always take it out

Ashen: piercings don’t always grow back up, Zach.

Z: a small one does. lol and what u think looks cool and what i think looks cool isn’t always the same MOM and plus it would piss dad off lol

Ashen: I can think of plenty of ways to piss off your dad that don’t involve punching holes in my kids skin.

Z: i can too. but its the small thing have count

Z: that*

Ashen: you are not getting your lip pierced. ain’t happening.

Z: why why why i like it

Ashen: Because it is dangerous.

Z: ok how

Ashen: infection of the piercing. the mouth holds the most germs of any place on the body. Also, migrating. That’s when the skin actually pushes the piercing out as it forms a scar. Then there’s always the risk of catching it on something – like a tooth or a fork while eating and ripping it out.

Z: nah

Z: yes there is a risk but i’m willing to take them risk

Ashen: I’m not. No.

Z: ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh ok you talked me out of it

Ashen: LOL you twerp

Z: you have to be ready for these kinds these talks

Ashen: Pfft, I am.

Z: good job you get a B

Ashen: I know how to say No

Z: no but i do want one but i dont see the point of arguing with you bcz i wont get anywhere with it

Z: but it good to want things

Ashen: Good, it saves us both a lot of time. I’m not budging on this one.

Ashen: Yes, it’s good to want things. When you are an adult, if you still want your lip pierced, then fine.

Ashen: But I bet anything you won’t.

Ashen: And trust me son, there’s gonna be a record of this cuz I’m gonna put it on my blog.

Z: ok

Z: do you like cigras

Ashen: no, and you’d better stop liking them too

Z: why

Z: ??

Z: ok ok ok

Z: but

Z: you know what you can get me for my 18 th b-day

Ashen: Luggage?

Z: whats that

Ashen: suitcases

Z: awwwwwwwwww ha ha ha

Z: i plan on moving out when i feel like it and trust me it would take that long

Z: but u can get me a cigra for my b-day

Ashen: yeah. I’ll be sure to remember that

* Ashen snorts

Z: lol is that kinda of like dad taking me to the strip club

Z: LMAO

Ashen: heh, are you forgetting which one of your parents is the cool one and which one is the one you don’t live with?

Z: ?? so your taking me ?? weird. toooooooooooo weird. yea ha hey guys nice club oh yea this is my mom

Ashen: LOL

Z: no no, bad!

Z: i just want a ciges

Z: cigra

Ashen: cigar

Ashen: when you can spell it right, we’ll talk.

Z: its a typo smartass

Z: lol

Z: i love you

Ashen: you’d better!